yesterday, i was sitting under a maple tree eating my peanut butter, cheese, mayonaisse, onion, and tuna sandwich when an acorn fell on my head. i looked at the acorn and thought that maybe if i paint it gold, i could sell it on ebay as a golden acorn and get a couple thousand dollars. but all of a sudden, i was attacked by seven squirrels. they clawed and bit and ran up and down the inside of my pants and shirt. i unloaded my super kung fu on them and they surrendered. the leader then spoke, "how dare you steal from our tree, give us our nut back." i made them a deal that if i gave it back to them, they would have to join me on my league of justice. he agreed and from then on we formed an alliance. i taught them kung fu and they raised me to be one of their own. i learned to climb trees, attack mailmen, and hibernate for the winter. We became one and formed our own league of justice, fighting crime wherever crime may be. whenever their is a cry in the dark or violence in the night, we will be their. we shall serve justice on a silver platter of vengeance and rage, because we are...... The Society of Squirrels!