A couple months ago, i got married. the marriage was going good until one day my wife asks me, " honey, why do you keeping pouring apple juice on yourself everyday?" i answered, " i read a blog last month that apple juice prevents you from being abducted by aliens." She laughed at me and mocked me for the rest of the day. one week later, i found out that she left me because i turned into a psychopath. I was very depressed, but not depressed enough to be abducted by aliens, so i kept pouring apple juice on myself. one day i was walking around town when i heard on the news that she had been abducted by aliens. Who's laughing now?!?!